Heartbreak, Barrel, Serenity

Updated: Jan 19


Three Tarot cards, side by side. On the left, the 3 of Swords, three swords piercing the heart of a sad knight. In the center, the Harbinger of Cups, a handsome human with long, flowing hair and closed eyes riding a giant chalice like a rodeo bull. On the right, the Elder of Cups, a buddha-like bald figure in loose clothing, smiling with tears in their eyes, and a chalice in place of their heart.

There is no vaccine for heartbreak.


In my youth, in the days when the Internet was still called "newspapers", I wrote a relationship advice column. I wrote under my middle name, because I thought at the time that "Have Patience" was delightfully quirky.


This is not a story about how taste changes with age. Well, it isn't not that. Have Patience.


Anyone who has spent any time with romance advice columns knows how frequently the question boils down to, "How do I find love without getting my heart broken?" And the answer is… you can't.


In order to love and to be loved, we must be willing to be vulnerable. We can't be loved without opening the depths of our innermost squish to the sharp, scary, pointy world. Throw yourself blindly into the source of your passion or approach it with measured calm, either way, there is always a chance you'll get hurt.


The choice isn't "Love safely or love recklessly". It's "Love Vulnerably or Not At All".


I won't pretend that heartbreak is easy. It can be the most pain a person can endure. But the alternative, living a life without love, is worse. Small comfort, I know. But worth the risk.